Hello, Readers! Clevenger here.

We’re closing out the end of the year, and the season brings along a lot to think about. Mainly, as a publishing author, sales. We saw such a great push in November during the debut of “War of Night.” Since then, the sales are slow, but slightly steady. We’ve done some great things in the local convention market, and hope to do more in the spring. But, how do I feel about it?

Well, generally. Pretty good.

Is it slightly sad to see those numbers slow down? Yes. But, in the scale of everything I would have expected to see, the sales for our debut was extraordinary. Taking into consideration our genre, the subject matter, our reputation as authors, and the state of the market, we have achieved great things. It is however, hard to remember that sometimes.

You see, we are on socials. I am becoming acquainted with SO many indie authors in different genres (namely romance adjacent). Watching them put dozens of books out is amazing, but it’s hard not to internalize that. It is hard to remember that their character driven stories may not require the same intricacies in world design or metaphysics. That they may be in a different stage of life that allows them to dedicate the time needed to write at that rate. Life wants us to be “competitive” or “comparative.” And it’s just not… me.

You see, I’ve never been competitive. I hate what it does to me. The few “competitions” I’ve been in have brought out a dark side of me. I get angry because things don’t go “my” way. I see the “wins” or “losses.” I have to view the world as “better” or “lesser” than me. It forces me to be selfish. It interferes with my empathy.

When I look at the world, I see how we all interact. When people are talking about the rights of LGBTQIA+ individuals, I see the phobics and bigots come out. They are “trained” to see the world in terms of wins/loss. If someone is “getting” rights, then it must mean they’re “losing” something? Right?

Now, I understand others can thrive in healthy competition, but not me. It reminds me too much of the give/take, win/loss mentality that I just don’t wear well on my shoulders.

That’s why I am so thankful that the surrounding author and artists community that I’ve fostered has been so welcoming. We’re promoting each other. Pushing each other to the forefront. I actually “love” when someone asks if we have a trope or topic in our book and I can say “No, we don’t. But, if you like THAT, can I recommend this author? I think they’d be RIGHT for you!”

So, as we approach the end of the year, I remain thankful. Thankful for our successes. Thankful for our friends. Thankful for the community. I appreciate it all.

Until next time.

Be Kind

-Clevenger